Humbled

Wow! What a week!! We just wrapped up our week long auction on FB to raise funds for our adoption, and all I can say is that we are extremely humbled. We are not inherently fundraisers, and to be honest, asking people for money is not something we enjoy doing. But since we are trying to get A here as quickly as possible, we knew we needed to do something. We thought that by putting together an auction, at least the bidders would be getting SOMETHING in return for their donations. We started out the week with 12 auction items, from people that we knew had a heart for adoption. We never expected to end the week with 32 items up for bid!! As the days went on, we heard from more and more people that wanted to donate to our auction...several whom we have never met! Not only were people so willing to donate, but our friends, family, and people who have just heard about our journey but do not know us personally, bid so generously. 

We had no idea what to expect from this auction. But I can tell you that the outcome FAR exceeded what we thought we would raise. The total from the auction is $3,272!!!! Is that not so awesome?? Thank you does not begin to express the gratitude we feel towards each and every person that bid on the items and donated. We were also blessed this week with a generous private donation from a precious, precious couple. We feel so unworthy of the gifts we have received! We give God all the glory for moving His people to help bring our sweet daughter home! Our prayer remains that as more and more people become aware of our story, that they will also become aware of the need of so many other sweet teenagers like A that still need to find their forever families. And above all, we hope that every person that visits this blog, will see that our Savior is the author of this story. We couldn't have written this script in our wildest dreams, and stand amazed in His presence!

A quick note about the progress we are making on the adoption front:) We mailed off our dossier yesterday!! It should be headed to Ukraine next week to start the process of being translated. Once we get our approval from USCIS, we will forward that on. That is the last piece we need to formally submit our dossier to the Ukrainian government. 

I cannot leave this post without acknowledging that today is Good Friday. The death and Resurrection of Jesus is what our whole faith is based on. I can't put in to words the feelings I have about my Savior dying for someone as sinful and lowly as myself. Our Women's Ensemble at church sang a beautiful song last week, and I would like to leave you with the lyrics. They express my feelings perfectly. Thank you again for all of your love, thoughts, support, and prayers. We feel each and everyone of them! We thank God for you, and hope that each of you have a wonderful Easter week-end!

How wide is Your love
That You would stretch Your arms 
And go around the world
And why for me would a Savior's cry be heard

I don't know
Why You went where I was meant to go
I don't know
Why You love me so

Those were my nails
That was my crown
That pierced Your hands and Your brow
Those were my thorns
Those were my scorns
Those were my tears that fell down
And just as You said it would be
You did it all for me
And after You counted the cost
You took my shame, my blame
On my cross

How deep is Your grace
That you could see my need
And chose to take my place
And then for me, these words I'd hear You say

Father no
Forgive them for they know not what they do
I will go
Because I love them so

Those were my nails 
that was my crown
that peirced your hands
and your brow
those were my thorns
those were my scorns
those were my tears that fell down
and just as you said it would be
you did it all for me
and after you counted the cost
you took my shame, my blame
on my cross

those were my nails
that was my crown
that peirced your hands
and your brow
those were my thorns
those were my scorns 
those were my tears that feel down
and just as u said it would be
u did it all for me
and after u counted the cost
you took my shame 
my blame on my cross

after u counted the cost 
u took my shame, my blame
on my cross 

That You would stretch Your arms 
And go around the world
And why for me would a Savior's cry be heard

I don't know
Why You went where I was meant to go
I don't know
Why You love me so

Those were my nails
That was my crown
That pierced Your hands and Your brow
Those were my thorns
Those were my scorns
Those were my tears that fell down
And just as You said it would be
You did it all for me
And after You counted the cost
You took my shame, my blame
On my cross

How deep is Your grace
That you could see my need
And chose to take my place
And then for me, these words I'd hear You say

Father no
Forgive them for they know not what they do
I will go
Because I love them so

Those were my nails 
that was my crown
that peirced your hands
and your brow
those were my thorns
those were my scorns
those were my tears that fell down
and just as you said it would be
you did it all for me
and after you counted the cost
you took my shame, my blame
on my cross

those were my nails
that was my crown
that peirced your hands
and your brow
those were my thorns
those were my scorns 
those were my tears that feel down
and just as u said it would be
u did it all for me
and after u counted the cost
you took my shame 
my blame on my cross

after u counted the cost 
u took my shame, my blame
on my cross 

Online Auction

I am thrilled to announce that we will be hosting an online silent auction this coming Monday-Friday, March 25-29! Every penny raised will go to bringing our sweet A home! We will a facebook page devoted soley to this auction. When I get it up and running later this week-end, I will post it here. How it will work, is that we will have a picture for each item or service being auctioned. If you would like to bid, simply comment below the picture what your bid is. At the end of the week, the highest bidder wins the item! To view all of the items available, click here. I have posted a few sneak peeks of auction items below. If you do not have a facebook account, but still want to bid, let me know and I will place your bid for you:) If you live out of town, and see an item that you would like, we will be happy to work with you on shipping! Please take a peek at the items, and share with your friends!! Thank you so much for all of the love, support, and prayers we have already received!

 Beautiful, custom burlap wreath. The bows and cross are detachable if you would like to change them out seasonally. I personally think this wreath would be beautiful for all seasons! Made with love by Lauren Blaylock Morris

Custom wood painting. Such a special painting that highlights all of the countries open for adoption. Painted by artist Ashley Finton

Renowned portrait photographer Tamara Lackey creates images that truly capture the essence of relationships and the emotion of the moment.  Join her for a relaxed, fun photo shoot of your family in the Triangle area of North Carolina.  Included with the session is a $150 print credit.  Expires March 25, 2014

Custom shirt size 5/6 made exclusively for this auction by Delaney's Den



Easter Package!!

Remember the sweet stranger I wrote about in my last post? If not, you can read about her here. Well, what I didn't tell you was that she gave me the contact of another fabulous woman who just so happens to have adopted siblings from our daughter's orphanage 2 years ago. These siblings grew up with our girl, and her son was classmates with our daughter!! How exciting is that?? So, I emailed her and immediately felt like we were old friends. It is so nice to have met such amazing people already on our short journey that have gone through exactly what we are going through!

Back to this in a minute. I was going to try to wait to tell our daughter's name until our court date and do a big reveal then. But honestly, it is taking a ton of energy to keep it in! It is much harder than I thought. With her being a teenager, and so many people out there already praying for her and knowing her, I feel like it is time to just let the world know her beautiful name!! Drum roll please.....our beautiful 15 year old Ukrainian daughters name is A(sorry, had to delete to protect the adoption process)!!! Isn't it a pretty name? I think it fits quite nicely with our other 4 girls' names. In case you have missed it these are our daughters: Aislynn, Avalea, Arabella, Adalaise, and Alona. Quite a mouthful, isn't it! I love how perfectly Alona's name fits with the rest of our girls.

Glad to get that out there! Now, back to my new friend:) Through emailing back and forth, she told me that a couple that lives near her were going to be leaving at the end of this week to visit A's orphanage to work on getting children approved for hosting programs this summer. She offered to help get a package together for me to send A. I was ECSTATIC!! I have been thinking about what I am going to get my girls for Easter this year, and I had been thinking about how I wished I could get something for A. Then, this opportunity came along. I am so excited that A will get her first presents from her family just in time for Easter! What better time to receive this gift, then at the time we remember our ultimate gift...the sacrifice of our Saviour.  Here is a picture of A's package:

Oh, how I wish I could be there to deliver it myself and to see her sweet face when she opens it!! We also enclosed a TON of pictures of us, so that she can look at her family whenever she wants:) We included a letter as well, and Alona's sweet former classmate translated it for us. Here is a picture of our names translated into Russian:

 I think that is pretty cool!!

Another piece of news is that we got our I-600A form mailed off yesterday! This is a big "milestone". Now, we sit and wait to hear back about getting a fingerprinting appointment.

Signed, Sealed, *hopefully* Delivered!!!

Please join us in prayer, that our form is received, and reviewed in a timely manner. We need approval of this to proceed with our adoption. Once we receive this, we can fully submit our dossier to the Ukrainian government.

"Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer", Romans 12:12. Clinging to this verse throughout this process. We are rejoicing in the hope of bringing Alona home soon, we know there were be lots of bumps to test our patience, and we most certainly will be praying every single step of the way!        





Seeking Treasure

So much has happened since my last post. I want to share with you today some of the things that have been happening...some pertain to our adoption, and some don't. It is a LONG post, but please bear with me to the end, because you will hear some pretty amazing things as the post goes on:) Others that have gone through adoption will understand that the adoption process can be all consuming. I am trying to find a balance between all things adoption, and our "normal" every day life. One thing I did not want to happen at the beginning of this process was for our 4 baby girls to feel pushed aside. It is extremely hard to find balance when you are constantly being pulled in a thousand directions....every single day!

 

 

This past Tuesday we had Part 2 of our home study. Our adoption specialist came to our house to do a walk through and conduct individual interviews with both Ryan and me. I am kind of obsessive when it comes to people coming over to our house. Ok....a lot obsessive! It doesn't matter if someone is just going to peek in the front door, I feel like everything has to be clean and perfect. Needless to say, preparing for our adoption specialist to come critique our home to make sure it was adequate for adopting... about sent me over the edge! I am SO thankful that that part of this whole process is over! Our individual interviews and the walk through went great. Our adoption specialist has been so kind to work swiftly, knowing that we want to move this whole process along to bring our daughter home soon. She had our home study write up back to us by Wednesday night for review!! How amazing is that? For those of you in the Little Rock area...if you ever need to have a home study done, please contact me and I will give you the information for our adoption specialist. She really has been such a blessing and comfort through this process.  

 

 

Thursday, I went on a field trip with my daughter Aislynn's pre-k class. Their class has been studying transportation, so we got to go on a trolley ride! We rode the trolley all around downtown, and got off at Heifer Village to take a tour and eat a picnic lunch. It was such a fun day...the weather was perfect and it was nice to spend some much needed quality time with my sweet girl. Here is a picture of us on the trolley:

 

 

 

Friday was another beautiful day, so the girls and I met some friends at the zoo. My children LOVE going to see all the animals. Their favorites are the penguins, elephants, and giraffes. No trip to the zoo would be complete without a train ride...which Aislynn pointed out is another form of transportation:) Our zoo recently did some renovations, and built a new playground area. The girls had fun playing on it. Below are pictures of Aislynn and Avalea on the train with friends, and my Arabella playing the bongo drums!

 

 

I had so much fun getting out and about with my girls this past week. We needed that time to step away from all the adoption tasks needing to get done just to enjoy life. Something that is becoming more and more evident to me though, is that it is getting harder and harder to go on with "normal" life. The absence of our 5th daughter grows stronger each day, and the desire to have her here....getting to do all these normal every day things..... is HUGE.

 

After spending Friday morning at the zoo, I came home to find an email from Miss A waiting for me:) It is such a thrill each and every time I get an email from her. Ryan and I had our usual phone conversation with her at 3:45 Saturday morning. I love finding out new things about her each and every time we talk. This week, she told us that she loves to play volleyball and that she wants to be a professional volleyball player!! I am so looking forward to taking her to some Volleyball games when she gets here.

 

Friday night, before I went to sleep I did a quick online search about Ukrainian hosting programs for orphans. One of my hopes through all of this, is to bring greater attention to older child and teenage adoptions. I am hoping to get a strong hosting program in our area started in the future. So, I was doing a little research, and found a blog by a woman who advocates for Ukrainian Orphans, and assists in hosting programs for them. I decided to send her an email just to make a connection.  I am SO glad I did!!  I really feel that the Lord prompted me to reach out to her, because it turns out that she knows A!!! She works with A's specific orphanage for hosting programs, and has met our sweet girl and spent time with her in Ukraine. She even has pictures of her! How awesome is this? A complete stranger that I *seemingly* randomly decided to email would know my girl?? I just have to acknowledge that the Lord had a hand in this. This is what my new friend had to say about A, " she is so sweet and has the cutest giggle. She wants to be adopted more than anyone I think. She is very much a girl and has big dreams". How absolutely precious is that? I mean, how great is our God, that He would use a perfect stranger to give me more positive confirmation about our daughter? I think anyone pursuing an older child for adoption has questions about how they will react to your family, how their past experiences have shaped them, and what problems they will have because of those experiences. I know I have had those questions, and it is so reassuring to hear from someone else that has that our daughter is kind and loving. Not that I was second guessing this, but it is still comforting to hear from other people how wonderful she is:)

 

Ryan and I try to do something fun with our girls each Saturday for a special treat. This Saturday we decided to take them to build a bear. Aislynn and Avalea already have bears that they ADORE. So we thought it would be fun to go get Arabella one and to let Aislynn and Avalea get some new accessories for their bears. The girls wanted to make one for A for us to take to her on our first visit to see her. Adalaise will get her very own bear when she is old enough to pick it out:) Here are some pictures of our trip to build a bear:

 

Arabella picked out a flower printed bunny, named "Roo Bunny"

 

Aislynn and Avalea overseeing the stuffing of A's bear

 

The girls giving the bears a bath

 

Here they are with their bears! Aislynn is holding her and A's bears.

 

I read Jesus Calling every morning for a quick devotional. Friday was the day that I reached out to a complete stranger and found out that she has a connection to A. Here is an excerpt from my reading Friday:

 

"There is immense hidden treasure to be found through listening to Me. Though I pour out blessings upon you always, some of My richest blessings have to be actively sought. I love to reveal Myself to you, and your seeking heart opens you up to receive more of My disclosure. Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you shall find; knock and the door will be opened to you"  Matthew 7:7

 

Does that not give you chills?? Had I not sought out this stranger, and sent her an email (which is not something I would normally do!), I would have missed out on such an amazing blessing. I would encourage you all...that if you feel a prompting from the Lord...do whatever it is that He is prompting you to do! You never know what treasures you could be missing out on. God continues to reveal Himself to me in more ways than I could have thought possible through this process. I pray He will use this journey to reveal Himself to others as well!





The Power of Prayer

This past Friday night I had the privilege of participating in our churches' first Women's Night of Prayer. I met with around 70 other ladies to sacrifice a night of sleep to pray for our church, our families, our community, and missions! I wasn't sure how this was going to work out...I am pretty sleep deprived on a daily basis due to one baby girl refusing to sleep through the night. I thought shortly after the 11:30 pm start time, I would be out. But let me tell you, God worked in a mighty way that night, and I could not tell that it was the middle of the night or early morning at all. Our committee members did a fantastic job of scheduling speakers, break out sessions, food, and music to keep us all going. The only problem we faced  was that we didn't have ENOUGH time to pray!

 

There is no way I can describe all that went on during the night of prayer, but I CAN tell you that I left with a new conviction and drive to really be a prayer warrior. Prayer has always been a huge part of my life, and I turn to prayer for guidance in just about every decision I make...especially big decisions like adoption!! But I was convicted to truly pray without ceasing and to leave my conversations with God open ended, so that He can speak to me at any moment of the day.

 

 

At our church, you simply cannot have a women's event without having door prizes....it's just not possible! So, I was asked to make something for a door prize. This is what I came up with

 

 

I found this quote by Corrie ten Boom and love it. I think it perfectly describes how meaningful and important prayer is.

 

At 2:45 am I had to slip away from the prayer activities to place my weekly phone call to our sweet daughter. She is 8 hours ahead of us, and at 11 am on Saturday mornings her time, a local girl comes to the orphanage to do translation work. She has been sweet enough to come a little early so that A and I can talk for 10 minutes. So each Saturday morning at 2:45 am, Ryan and  I wake up and call her. These phone conversations have become such special moments for me. I can't describe to you the joy that I feel each time I get to talk to our sweet girl. She is so curious, and always has a ton of questions ready for me! This past phone call, during our night of prayer, she asked me if I knew any Russian. I told her that I knew very little, but that Ryan and I were planning to learn as much Russian as we could before we come see her. She told me that she wanted to learn English before we bring her home as well. Then, the most amazing thing happened. It is one of those moments, that truly changes your life forever. As we were winding up our conversation for the week, she said her first English words to me. She said, " I love you, bye bye". I don't think I will ever be able to recall that moment without tears welling up in my eyes. Our precious, 15 year old daughter that has lived a life void of care and love for so long, so willingly told me that she loved me. While it thrilled my heart to hear her say that, it also drove a dagger through it. My precious child who has so much love to give has not had anyone to show her love in return. It enrages me that she has been in an orphanage for years, and before that...who knows what she had to endure. I cannot thank the Lord enough for choosing us to show our daughter what true love is! What an honor and privilege this is. The story that God is writing for our family is more than I could have possibly imagined, and I am humbled that He has found us worthy to adopt one of His precious children as our own. To God be the glory!!

 

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us" Ephesians 3:20

 

 



Home Study Part 1

This morning Ryan and I had our joint interview for our home study. To say I was nervous, would be an understatement. We are fortunate enough to have friends that have gone through the adoption process before us, so we had an idea of what to expect, but still....I was a nervous wreck! When you decide to get pregnant, there is no one there to critique you and to tell you if you are fit enough to be parents. Well, I take that back...you might have people tell you these things, but they are generally your family or friends....not professionals who can allow you to adopt or to the end the whole process! The only thing I can compare this interview to would be our premarital counseling when I felt like we were being judged on if we were ready for marriage or not. The only difference there was that we knew our marriage counselor extremely well, and we had never met our adoption specialist. In fact, the last time Ryan and I sat down together for an "interview" was for our premarital counseling, so its been a while!

 

 

I am pleased to say that I think our interview went well! We had been told it would last  1 1/2 to 2 hours, but we were out of there in 1 hour and 10 minutes. We didn't delve extremely deep into any one topic. The main topics of conversation were how we each deal with grief/loss, what our expectations are for Miss A and how we see her fitting into our family, how we think this will affect our 4 biological daughters, what kind of support system we have, and our plans for her schooling. Thankfully, Ryan and I had thoroughly discussed each of these topics prior to our interview, so we were able to answer these questions easily, and on the same page.

 

Our next step is our individual interviews and our home walk through. These will take place this coming Tuesday. After that, our home study will be complete! Our placement agency is finishing up our dossier, so once we get the home study write up, we will be ready to submit our dossier! After that, will be the long, agonizing wait to hear from immigration. Please be in prayer for the government agents that will be looking over our dossier, both here in the US and also in Ukraine... that they will look favorably upon our application, and that they will process it quickly. Having a child in another country that you can't talk to on a daily basis, that you can't hug and tell them that you love them, that you can't be there for for the little every day things, is torture. We pray that this process will move along as swiftly as possible so that we can bring our sweet daughter home, and hopefully start the healing process for her from all of her past heartbreak and disappointments.

 

I listened to "You're Not Alone" by Meredith Andrews the other day. I have always loved this song, but this was the first time I have listened to it since starting our adoption process. It has such a wonderful message. My  heart breaks for all orphans who face each day without a loving family, with sadness and hopelessness and fear. No child should have to feel abandoned and alone in this world. And yet, so many children do. I am looking forward to the day that we bring A home and show her what loving parents look like, what a loving, supportive family looks like. That she doesn't have to face this world alone, that she is cared for and she is worth loving! But even more than that, I cannot wait to teach her about our loving Savior. I can't wait to teach her that even in her darkest moments, He was there. That if she will let Him, He will use all of those heartbreaks and disappointments for good. That even though she couldn't see Him in the darkness, she made it through because of Him. I would encourage you to listen to "You're Not Alone" below. And if you do, please pray that many more orphans will find a family, and not have to face this world alone. And even more than that, that they will know that they have a Father that loves them and is with them every moment of every day, even if they can't see Him or feel Him.

 



Haiti

Ryan came back from Haiti this past Wednesday and wrote the post below on his trip.

 

I would like to start out by saying I am not a blogger.  This is my first blog post and I thought it would be appropriate to talk about the recent mission trip I went on.

 

I decided to go on a mission trip to Haiti.  Originally I was going to go to the Amazon, but I felt something compelling me to go to Haiti instead.  Out of the 10 people that were going, 8 were from Immanuel and I only knew 1.  The two people that were not from the Church turned out to be invaluable.  They are two younger guys that were born and raised in Haiti until the age of 5, then they moved to the states.  They now live in Arkansas and play football for another one of the guys on the trip.  They not only served as all important translators, but they also added a sense of calm to the group that was refreshing. 

 

The journey started for me one day when an email went out to the Haiti group that said our Pastor in Haiti was expecting someone in the group to preach.  I began to feel convicted and let our group leader know that I did not want to, but if no one else would step up, I would do it.  I have never preached before and this made me extremely nervous and anxious.  Lance (our group leader) informed me that no one else would probably want to, so I should start preparing.  Through the help of my MasterLIfe teachers, Bob Beach and Chris Ahne, and some helpful tips from others, I started to form a sermon around Discipleship, Obedience, and the Disciple's Cross.

 

I worked on the sermon for about two weeks off and on, and the night I finished I let Wendy read it.  Her response: "It's really booky"... Yikes.  Basically I had come up with a dissertation on discipleship that would put most people to sleep... Then having to feed it through a translator, it was sure to bomb.  This made me feel a lot better about the whole situation. I decided I would put it up and finish it later on the trip... Hopefully being able to pull it out of the dictionary it seemed to fit in.

 

The trip started out about as smooth as it finished.  I had come down with what was probably strep throat and needed a personal favor from a friend to call in a zpak. Luckily he was able to and I hoped this would make me better.  We were slated to leave Thursday February 21 around 6 in the morning.  I got a call at 9:30 the night before letting me know that our flight had been cancelled and that I needed to finish packing (I hadn't even started yet) and get to the church at midnight.  In order to make it to Haiti before Saturday, we would have to make our connecting flight in Dallas.  We would leave at 12:30 am and make our connection.  Tensions were a little high at first because it had been icing and no one knew the conditions of the roads.

 

We made it to Dallas alright and then Miami.  It was about this time my voice completely left me and I felt a fever coming on.  Once we landed in Haiti, I began to feel better, probably because of nervous adrenaline.  We witnessed our first drama as some men outside were about to throw down over a tip we didn't need to pay them for handling our bags.  Our pastor had arranged some help and I am not sure where these guys fit in.  Regardless, we paid them off and continued on to our Missionary house.

 

Driving through downtown Port au Prince was a different experience.  Roads went from bad to worse.  The devastating effects of the earthquake were immediately noticeable and the whole place seemed to be rock, concrete, and trash.  People were lined up everywhere trying to peddle goods, scrap through the trash, and find something to eat.  As we pulled up to the house we would be staying at, I saw our armed guard that I referred to as "Shades".  I am not sure if his shotgun made me feel better or not.  He looked like a Haitian version of the Terminator.  The house was pretty good and the bathrooms were interesting.  It was here I pondered the same question every morning... What's the point of a stall if the door closed against the toilet?  Hot water was not a luxury we had on this trip, nor consistent AC.  Usually we were too tired to care though.  The pastor let us on to some helpful information... To Haitians all us "blondes" (Americans) look alike.  I thought this was incredibly funny.

 

Loading up the van with the armed guard in the background

Pastor Sanousse in front of the missionary house

 

The first full morning we made our way to the first spot of the Eye Clinic we would be setting up.  We carried about 300 lbs of gear with us including a refractometer, 2000 pairs of glasses, a laptop, and a small printer.  Our mission was to give sight to the blind and share the salvation story with those that needed to hear it by way of salvation beads.  We would pass the time everyday by jokingly starting a rift between warehouse workers (inventory) and office people (laptop and refractometer).  This would also help as a divergence against everything we saw.  We set up shop in Kenscoff, a small settlement a couple of thousand feet up in the mountains.

 

 

Tent Town in Kescoff

Setting up eye clinic

Carrying some equipment to the church

Figuring it all out

Local potty... I called it a "lean to" because you had to lean against the wall to go number 2.

Familiar site.  Trash just littering the ground

 

 

The view was beautiful and almost made you forget about the devastation below.  We had to hike about a quarter mile up the mountain because our small van loaded down with 14 - 16 people at all times couldn't quite make the trip.  Once at the church, I noticed something.  Trash.  Everywhere.  In town it was easy to disregard it amongst the sites, but up here it just stood out.  It is just a way of life for the Haitian people.  I saw empty Styrofoam everywhere along with bottles and miscellaneous paper.  We saw about 80 people total that day and I learned how to use the computer to try and find matches for peoples prescriptions.  It felt good to help them out.  Some people had -10 vision in both eyes and had not owned a pair of glasses.  Think about the difference that would make.

 

The next day we set up shop in the Pastor's church in the middle of Port au Prince.  We had to drive up a dried out river bed through a market.  When we got off the van, I will never forget the smell, sights, and sounds all around me.  The river bed was filled with trash, fesces, and broken bottles and more flies per square inch than I have ever seen in my life.  The Haitian heat combined with burning plastic and trash in the distance made the aroma that much more inviting.  Filling the air was the sound of Haitian music.  I don't know who was singing, or what the song was, but I was sure it was a song of grief and despair.  You could feel the emotion in the singers voice.  I started to look around and noticed half houses, tents, and bunkers stacked ontop of each other seemingly going on forever.  In the riverbed was a boy playing with a kite.   He seemed to not notice, or care that he was playing in the midst of all this filth.  Around him were pigs and goats nosing through the trash for something to eat or a place to plop down in the shade.  Everything seemed incredibly surreal to me.

 

Boy playing in the river bed

 

View of Port au Prince

Walking equipment up

Pastors Church

Church from back looking forward

Outside the church and the roof

View from my post.  I wish those warehouse guys would get back to work

180 degree panorama from church roof

 

We made our way through the labyrinth of housing and up the hillside.  Seemingly out of nowhere we popped into the church.  This was little more than a concrete bunker with windows.  Somewhere in the Church I felt a presence.  It was a sharp reminder that God can use anyone and anyplace to further His cause and message of hope and salvation. 

 

As we saw patients that day, kids would be looking in on us with curiosity through the windows.  The police came by with loaded shotguns and asked if we could see them as well.  Who in their right mind would say no?  The whole time they were being seen and trying on glasses, I just kept praying that they would find something they wanted... And that the gun laying against a pew pointed at my buddies head would cooperate.  Thankfully it did.  A little later a woman brought her son up to be seen.  I could barely look.  A thyroid problem had pushed his eyes out to the point of busting and deformed his face and body.  We couldn't get a good reading with his eyes being the way they were.  He was so happy to be seen and wanted a pair so bad.  I didn't know how to react to this.  Here was a boy whose life is literally ticking away and the simple joy of a pair of glasses was all he was focused on.  He needed serious medical attention but that luxury was not available.  I still don't know how to process that whole situation.  Later we saw two witch doctors as well that were drunk.  All in all it was a very emotional day.  We ended up seeing about 100 people and gave away 120 pairs of glasses including readers.

 

That night I would concentrate on rewriting my sermon.  I had talked to the pastor and he kept referring to love.  I needed to rewrite the entire message of discipleship and obedience into a message of love for Christ and the love of Christ.  I needed to add some personal examples of how prayer and meditation would change my life forever and how the saving grace of Christ is sometimes only evident when your life has hit rock bottom.  I would concentrate on my own journey, my own mistakes, my own black pit that I found my life in, and how only Christ could pull me out and turn my life around. 

 

The next morning in the church we had given out glasses the day before, in an open air service that filled the hills, I gave my testimony and life story to a group of Haitian believers through the translations of Pastor Sanousse. As much as I would like to think the Holy Spirit made an impact on that small church that day, that my sermon on the importance of creating disciples for Christ would change someone, it was me that was probably most effected.  I probably will never experience the goose bumps I did that day ever again.  This church had one outlet, a keyboard that kept messing up, a bass, and a drum set that looked like it was held together by duct tape.  Somehow this set up produced the most raw and honest worship I have ever heard.  The sound of the voices, the crying out, the singing to God that I heard that day raised my hair and still gives me goosebumps as I think about it.  The worship that came from those peoples mouths was pure and you could feel the reliance on God to provide.  No lights, no powerpoints, not even 4 walls, and God was alive and well in that place.

 

The only thought that kept passing through my mind was why do most people have to be broken before they are willing to pour out their hearts for God?  Why must we think that we have it all figured out when we are comfortable and doing well?  I could only dream of the services and worship that would come out of our own church if everyone had the reliance on God that half these people did.

 

View outside the church

People even try to sell us things in the van

View from on top of the mountain

Monument down town just before my curse

Wonder if they are FDIC insured

Preaching in Haiti

Paintings were everywhere

I am convinced that the number one industry is Beauty Salons

 

 

After church we went on a short tour around town.  We got out of the van in front of where the palace used to be.  As I was walking around the common space in front, I felt a presence different from in the church.  I turned around to see a man following me about 3 feet behind.  He kept with me stride for stride and the look in his eyes is hard to describe.  He kept following me and playing with something in his hand.  He kept mouthing things and wouldn't look at anyone else.  I went and stood next to our group and he stood with me.  I tried shaking him and couldn't so finally I ran back to the van and shut the door.  He stood outside for a while continuing to stare daggers at me and finally went to the front of the van and did some weird dance and left.  I am pretty sure he was either insane or put a voodoo hex on me.

 

On Monday, my birthday, we went to another part of Haiti about 2 hours away, but about only 20 miles or so.  We never seemed to get away from traffic or roads that had man sized craters in them, so travel took a while.  I was feeling a little confused at this point.   We had thought we were helping people out all week, but everywhere we looked, it was just despair.  I was never the one fitting the glasses on people, so I never really saw any reinforcement that we were making a difference.  We pulled up to the Church we were setting up in that day and it was completely made out of signs and tarps.  A lonely generator supplied the power to the one outlet we would have to use for all of our equipment.  The power kept cutting on and off and somehow we saw 160 people that day. 

 

On the way back, a few minutes down the road, God would provide me with the reinforcement I needed.  We passed an old man walking down the road and when he turned around, I saw a pair of glasses on his face that still had the tag.  The only think bigger than those frames was the smile on his face.  As we passed, he gave us two big thumbs up and a happy wave.  That let me know we made a real difference.  That was the best birthday present I could have gotten. 

 

Day care center

View of some of the equipment

Inside the tent church

Trying on glasses.  Edge of Darkness movie poster made half the roof

Rick contemplating his next piece of sage advice

32

At least in America you get thrown in jail before you get molested

Birthday celebration.  Sugar cane cokes and Haitian ice cream

 

 

The next day was bittersweet.  We were leaving.  I wanted to get back and see Wendy and my girls, but to just leave this place seemed wrong.  We arrived at the airport and the drama started.  Our plane kept getting delayed and finally we knew we wouldn't meet any of our connections.  We ended up staying in the Haitian airport for almost 8 hours before we took off.  That was the beginning of our 25 hour track home.

 

 

 

Looking back, I am happy I went... Even if I did get a curse.  It is a reminder that we are incredibly blessed.  I felt the undeniable presence of God amongst the trash in the river bed.  I heard a lot of sage advice from a guy named Rick.  I got to know some good friends (who enjoyed dry humor and running their mouths about as much as I do to pass the time) and hopefully helped raise the quality of life for some 300 people, if even a little bit.  Hopefully our visit was an encouragement to the believers and gave them the strength to continue serving Gods mission amongst the challenges they face every day.

 

 

 

20 ounces of Red Bu... errr. Toro, 2 bucks

Kids looking through the window

 

Pop tarts are truly universal

Early morning and late night hang out spot

 

We stayed right in the center

 

Getting our bearings

 

Pigs looking for some shade and rest in the river bed

 

Where the palace used to be

 

Mess hall

 

Haitian market

 

Getting the equipment up to church

 

Tent church

 

Not sure what the deposits are at this bank

 

Mickey, SpongeBob, and Barney welcome you to Kindergarten